This is class 4 of HOW TO START PARENTING THE HEART OF YOUR CHILD: FREE PARENTING CLASS
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Here’s what it is and what it isn’t……
If you’ve had a toddler around for 5 mins you’ve likely been bombarded with the famous “why questions”.
Here are just a couple from our toddler last week…
Why does the bird fly Mommy?
Why do I have to take a bath?
Why do you say I love you?
Why Mommy, why do I have to go to bed!?!?
Why Why Why!
Although this can be frustrating, it turns out they’ve actually found a really great way to understand something. Look at the Why.
Today in class Number 4 we’ll look at What Is Parenting The Heart Of Your Child Really?
Why you ask? (LOL pun intended)
Asking why helps them understand the character of God and helps you understand your child.
This is an important part of laying the foundation for real communication (see day 3 of the challenge if you haven’t), real relationships (with you and with Jesus) and winning the heart of your child for life!
Before we get into how to do this, let me share what Heart Based Parenting is not.
It is not constantly lecturing your child, giving a background for every step they take or decision they make, essentially trying to control them or the situation. That can certainly push them away.
When we lecture, they only will only hear the ” do this and don’t do that ” which can encourage rebellion.
Instead, we need to take the time to see God’s “why” in key areas of parenting or where they are struggling and
When they are little we share the why more often:
“don’t touch that because you will get hurt”
“We don’t hit because God says to love one another and hitting hurts people”
If we have been parenting their hearts all along, we do it less often as they get older. Allowing them to branch a little and own their actions, but being willing to pull them back and correct them with a “why” as needed.
You can go from saying:
“No, you can not watch that (because even though it doesn’t seem like it, all things we consume affect our hearts and God cares the most about our hearts)”
“Do you think that is something you should watch? Does it fit the Philippians 4:8 filter?”
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.
Yes? Ok, great I think you made a good choice!
No? Ok, great, I think you came up with a good answer. God loves your decision that honors Him!
It is a balance of asking good “why” questions and sharing good “why” lessons. We can then choose when to share with them and ask them to share with us, there is a mutual understanding.
That understanding often leads to them “owning” that area in their life and being willingly obedient.
Here’s the other “why” to look at when parenting the heart of your child…
Why are they behaving that way? Is there anything else involved besides disobedience?
Are they tired or hungry? ( this is seriously for all ages! )
Did they have a hard day?
Did someone hurt their feelings that day?
Are they craving time with you?
(for the older ones) Are they needing some more time with God?
Do they need space?
When you take into the equation other “whys” they are facing you can pray and decide if it’s discipline, discipling or grace that needs to be given.
Ok, so today I’m basically challenging you to be a toddler and start thinking “why” about everything – ha!
But in all seriousness, this is an important piece!
So I want you to find ONE way you can ask why today! I bet you’ll be able to!
But don’t stop there!!
Once you have taken the step above, please do this…
Tell someone. Accountability is a good thing.
Leave a comment and tell me your plan, send me an email or text in the messenger chat in the bottom right corner. Tell a friend or join us in the Like Minded Musings Imperfect Moms Private Facebook Group for accountability, connection and encouragement in Faith, Family, and Homeschool!
Don’t miss the other parts of the 5-day Parenting Class!
Don’t Miss the Other Sessions in the How to Start Parenting the Heart of Your Child: Free Parenting Class!
- The Best Place To Start In Parenting The Heart Of Your Child
- Mom, Are You Scared to Pray When Parenting The Heart Of Your Child?
- How To Communicate When Parenting The Heart Of Your Child
- What Is Parenting The Heart Of Your Child Really?
- How To Tackle Hard Issues When Parenting The Heart Of Your Child
Joining you in the in’ between,
Talk to you soon,
O Lord, You have pleaded the case for my soul; You have redeemed my life. Lamentations 3:58